Monday 24 June 2013

The Reveal: My Father in Law

Revealing my pregnancy to my father-in-law was it's own kind of awkward.  This is a man I have never met, and with whom I can not speak because we don't share a common language.  Still, this is the man who cared for my husband as a small boy and who stayed with him when his mother pulled up stakes and left.

We started out by trying to call my FIL on Sunday morning.  Five different times my husband tried to call Romania and kept being told that the number could not be put through.  He decided, finally in desperation to call his half-brother and make sure the number was working.  My husband spent the next 5 minutes conversing with his brother, I could make out that they were verifying numbers and that my husband did indeed have the right number... I also managed to understand that using Skype wasn't possible... and that my husband hadn't shared the news yet with his brother.  When he finally did, he did so in english (which both brothers speak well) and so i was able to join in the conversation.  It turns out that the step-mother is out of the city and my FIL is apparently unable to operate Skype, or really the computer at all, without her.  The brother told us he would call the father and ask him to call us, and promised not to reveal the reason why.  He told us he was very happy to see us in just 6 weeks now! 

We waited by the phone for a while but FIL didn't call until we had made our way across town to a birthday party for a very cute 1 year old boy.  It is so different now being at these parties with small children everywhere and deciding what sort of parents we are likely to be (my guess is very protective).  When my FIL called my husband went to the foyer and began to speak quickly in Romanian.  I joined him and listened in unable to understand anything.  When he was finally done he looked at me with tears in his eyes.  You could tell he had his father's approval and that it meant a lot.  He said "This is from my father" and kissed me tenderly on the cheek.  "He also says 'easy pregnancy, easy delivery,  and don't stop!' ".  We laughed and then my husband held me and whispered in my ear "He also says that even from this distance he can tell how much joy you have brought into my life.  He says he is very glad that you are his daughter." 

I am looking forward to meeting my father in law, although disappointed I will not be able to communicate with him directly.  I expect to see a lot of my wonderful husband in this man. 

11 comments:

  1. He sounds like an amazing man... And I think he's thrilled to have a grandchild on the way! So exciting!

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    1. Yeah, I think my FIL had given up on my hubby... now he wants me to work on his middle son while I'm there and find a woman for him.

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  2. Aww, I'm all teary. That is so sweet. So glad that you will finally get to meet him in person! Are you going there?

    I can appreciate being in a situation where verbal communication is difficult, but love is universal, as are smiles, and you'll have lots of both to bond over I'm sure.

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    1. Yes, we are going to Romania for 1 week in August, then we have 2 days alone in Paris and then we are meeting my whole family in Barcelona for 1 week. It's going to be CRAZY!! But so much fun!

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  3. I've been following your reveal news. How fun! Once people start to know you can really reveal in "being pregnant." congrats!

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    1. Actually I am getting mroe and more nervous about things are more people know... strange right? But I sort of loved the little secret between just me and my guy.

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  4. Aw, this is such a sweet story -- I'm so glad you guys were finally able to get the news to your FIL and his reaction sounds just perfect. Can't believe what an intense back-story and complex family dynamic your husband has, nor how you'll be feeling in that moment, revealing your news to each of these relatives. I just hope everyone responds in the best way possible, with love and support!

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    1. So far everyone has been great... but i am worried about the "larger world" finding out and getting comments about how old i am ... that's where i am afraid i will feel judged.

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  5. That was such a beautiful story! I'm so happy you could feel so loved from a distance.

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  6. It might be the hormones, but I'm totally crying right now. Such a sweet, touching reaction. I am so glad :) Hugs!

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    1. I don't know what you are talking about... pregnant women don't have crazy hormones ;)

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