Step away from the thermometer

After making checking my temperature a default activity over the last 8 months I have discovered that this is a habit I now have to break.  I sent myself into a tailspin of panic last week because my temperature was 36.8, then, 36.7 then 36.6 I was panicked... I was certain I was going to lose the pregnancy.

I asked The Google.  Google gave me a good piece of advice (I hope).  Step away from the thermometer.  There will be fluctuations in temperature at this point.  That a temperature change is not the sign of a miscarriage unless it is a much bigger temperature drop.  I haven't had any severe cramping, just little cramps.  And unlike last time there has been no spotting or bleeding of any kind.

I am trying to remain calm, to not panic, to not give my poor baby any more stress hormones than I already have coursing through my body.  I keep wanting more pregnancy symptoms.  I am definitely (TMI ahead) constipated.  And I have to carry tums in my purse already.  But where is the nausea??!! Where is the morning sickness??!! I want to have every classic pregnancy symptom in the book so that I know my hcg is rising.   My husband laughs at me, he thinks I should be thanking my lucky stars. 

How solving a mystery can result in pregnancy symptoms

I have no doubt that the phenomenon is well studied by any woman who is currently trying to conceive.  It is almost mystical the rate at which she can develop every symptom known to affect those in early pregnancy simply by reading a list.  Like the "communicated" wind turbine syndrome  early pregnancy symptoms are, no doubt in my mind, completely and totally caused by the nocebo effect.

In one of my many dozens of searches I have done over the years into "early pregnancy symptoms" I once came across this sage advice:

Remember, many pregnant women who were not trying to conceive do not even realize they are pregnant until well into the first trimester, meaning that symptoms are often subtle or nonexistent during the two week wait.

Oh, yeah... that is definitely advice i need to take.  It should help me to stop googling symptoms to see if that twinge in my back, that dryness in my mouth, that queasiness in my belly could herald the arrival of a baby.  Of course it never does.  Every month I announce to my husband "I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant.  Don't you think?  Do you think I could be pregnant?"  He wisely nods yes and we play this game for two weeks until my period arrives and brings with it a flood of tears.

So, this month when i was convinced that I had not ovulated  my boobs felt no bigger than usual for a period.  The nipples did not seem to mysteriously darken in certain light (duh... that's called shadows) and my cramps seemed to be nice normal run of the mill pre-menstral cramps... gearing up for the visit by the painters on Thursday or Friday.

That is until I ran a single Google search yesterday at lunch: "Can ovulation be delayed after a positive OPK?"  Well, as usual The Google Oracle spit out an answer and in summation the truth is that sometimes it can take as much as 3 days for your body to experience a thermal shift after ovulation has occurred.  And now my pattern is definitely biphasic... which means suddenly these damn breasts seem so sore... and I can't seem to stop feeling them (making them more sore no doubt).  And I'm definitely tired this morning.  Really tired.  And... damn... i'm playing that stupid two week wait game again. 

Dear BBT, WTF?

BBT:36.79 yesterdays BBT: 36.54 Thursdays BBT 36.71
So, I had a low BBT for two days following my expected ovulation, and so i mourned slightly the lost chance for getting pregnant, my bank account mourned a LOT and my bank rejoiced knowing they were going to be able to post record breaking profits as we pay a team of doctors to stare at my cervix.

Now, it seems my BBT likes to play mind games with me.  For the last 3 days my temperature has been up.  Why??  What does my body gain from torturing me.

Now of course things like alcohol can raise my BBT.... and I may have had a glass of wine last night... but just one!  But that doesn't account for the torture of the last three days.

Has anyone else ever experienced this?  Can it be a delay in ovulation?  If so I'm not sure we timed the baby dance right.  So did we waste our last precious month??!!

Did I or didn't I...

Temperature:  36.22 or 36.77

Last night was a late night.  Very late. 

I woke up this morning in time for work... took my temperature and fell asleep while doing it.  The beeping of the thermometer woke up me... it said 36.22.  But... was it actually in the right place, under my tongue, or was it off to the side as my tongue lolled out of my mouth.

Then... when I woke up again and the reading on the temperature was 36.77.  This is higher than normal for my BBT post ovulation.  But I don't know if i was asleep long enough after getting out of bed for it to be my BBT.  Actually it is higher than normal for my non-basal body temperature.  So, i am left in doubt.. .did i?  or didn't i?

I know that you can have an LH surge from the ovulation kits and not actually produce an egg.  So, I don't know yet if have a chance to get pregnant this month or not.  I will have to wait until tomorrow.  I don't want to wait until tomorrow.

UPDATE:  when I got home from work I noticed that you can get almost a 1 C temperature drop if you take your temperature with your mouth open. So I am keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow.

The Big O...

Do you remember the time when if you got a text message asking if you'd O'd this morning it was from an insecure lover wondering if it was good for you?  Not anymore.  Now all of the O's have to do with Ovulation.  The biggest most important O in my life right now. 

I have learned a lot about ovulation through charting my temperature.  But although this seems like a really easy task it can become ridiculously complicated.  Your basal body temperature (BBT) is supposed to be taken as soon as you wake up.... errr... following at least 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep that is... which is where it becomes complicated for me.  I will often wake up during the night, and now as soon as I do I become obsessed with the fact that I have to take my temperature.  Since my thermometer is not lit (which is a really stupid for a digital thermometer that you are supposed to check before you are allowed to even get up and pee) this is something i have to manage in the semi-darkness and something i try to do without waking my husband.  So, if I wake up in the middle of the night then I will take the temperature, and try to read it in the bathroom.  If i just wake up because I am tossing and turning then i will try to take the temperature and try to see the numbers by the glow of my cell phone.

The problem is that this often leads to 2 or 3 different temperatures being taken in the course of the night.  So which one is right.  Normally I take the lowest temperature.  This is an especially important rule during the two week wait because that plummet of temperature the last 2 days before my period are the early wake up to the fact that I am not pregnant.  But today is (possibly) ovulation day.  My first temp was 36.12C, then I woke up sometime in the middle of the night with a temp of 36.25C and finally when I woke up this morning it was 36.42 C.  So... the question is... is my temperature up because I ovulated?  Or is it up because i wasn't asleep again between the second and the third time.  My "coverline"  the imaginary boundary that my temperature crosses when I ovulate is around 36.55.  Are we almost there?  is there an egg lose in my fallopian tube looking for a partner?

Cross your fingers, hold your breath... the two week wait has begun.